I love corvids. Crows…Ravens…Those gorgeous messengers between our world and that of the spiritual realm. These two birds, as well as my wolf guide me down my life’s path. I always had a fascination with these majestic beings, and always wanted to encounter them and to hold them/bond with them…..well….today that happened in a way that was unexpected.

I get a message from my boyfriend with a picture attached. One of our crows was in the midst of passing as he was on his way to pick me up. I was so upset hearing one of our buddies that lived outside was passing….we didn’t know this one individually, bur it was still a friend to us, regardless. While he picked me up and we stopped to get grocery items, I remembered to pack my sage before heading out, and that crow would not leave my mind. Apparently while we were out, its murder and surrounding crows held their funerary rite of passing around our friend. My love dug the hole in an area we were most drawn to/felt was sacred, then proceeded to go back to our friend. Yes… I will not lie I was scared/timid at first…I’ve heard so many stories of crows flipping out around humans when they were dealing with their murder , and if you screw up…well , guess who won’t be a friend of the crows anymore? So many thoughts as we approached the dearie. Putting on our gloves, we gently scooped him up and wrapped him n a makeshift newspaper blanket. I kept looking down at the beautiful creature…seeing how majestic and stoic it was, even after passing. We knew we had to return the earth’s messenger back to her, so that the spiral could continue. As we walked back with my cradling it like a baby, we noticed the crows just stayed in their funerary spots from earlier….no aggressive cawwing or swooping at us….as we buried their cohort and did a sage ceremony and shared a few words and protection prayers for this lovely being. After the ceremony, we headed back towards his house, and two crows glided gently by us (once again, no dive attacks) and cawwed (non aggressively..no ‘attacks’ in their tone) before flying away from the site, as if saying thank you to making sure their friend/family member was safe. What a way to spend the day before your anniversary.

This really made me think about the difference between people and the levels of honouring nature – especially after reading another blog.

So many out there would be like ‘Ohh, I shall keep this , keep that, or keep the whole carcass ‘ just to ‘prove’ an image. Just like the other article , though, I too felt the energy when staring at this crow, a spirit totem guide for me…. I must return Earth’s messenger back to the soil it was created from…I must keep its dignity….And in turn, I felt peace from nature around me. I chose nature over ego. I could have easily fed the ego, and took either a feather, got its skull like Predator, etc. But I honoured this being. It deserved to be laid to rest with mother earth with dignity and love that it was brought in with…not a display of ego and proof.

 

Here’s a link to the article. It is a very good read and I recommend giving it a view!

http://www.spiralelixir.com/2013/11/honoring-the-spirit-of-the-dead-respecting-the-medicine-way/

 

 

Blessed be , from your Maritime Mistress of the Macabre. Be nice to your fellow beings in nature, and blessed Spring Equinox xxx

Recently I came across someone near and dear to me who has been dealing with issues of ‘not feeling enough’, being a bundle of nerves, as well as a lack of self love.

First of all, I assured said person that I too had been down that road of all those ‘effects’- so to speak- and trying to figure out what links could be connected so I can try to help the self love healing process. Which, coming from past experience, I know that this can be quite the path of hardships.

My doctor keeps record of every new thing and activity I do. I thought he was batshit bonkers at first, but then I realized he had a method to his madness. He was keeping track of possible links for future reference if I developed anything wrong with me. Why would he want to know what small activities I was doing? Well maybe it could relate to why I feel a certain way, the stresses, etc. Using this method, I then went on to interrogate.

“God this, God that, God comes first, etc” I stopped her right there in her tracks. It is perfectly normal to bond/love your deity..but there is a point you lose yourself. In my belief (For those who have not read my previous blog postings- I am a Wiccan – Solitary Eclectic, if you prefer), where we believe in our friendship/relationship with our Gods/Goddesses make us one and one is not greater than the other. We don’t kneel to our Gods and Goddesses, instead we walk beside them as a God/Goddess ourself, and like a true friend, they are there for us..not treating us any less or holding them captive with possible repercussions if we ‘sin’. The first thing I told her was to stop putting herself down on a lower level, and instead see herself as a Goddess at the same ranking, for then she will not only love herself, but she will also respect and hold herself as high as she places her deity. Secondly, stop caring what others think. Yeah sure, you did one of those ‘sins’ (when in actuality , it’s not at all) …it’s called being human; as long as it harmed no one in the process- it’s all good. Make a mistake? Don’t think you won’t make it into the pearly gates..look and learn from it…and create your own pearly -AND- diamond encrusted gates where a big cloud of cotton candy welcomes you with open arms. We should NEVER be in fear of our Gods/Goddesses..that is not love our respect. All they ask of us is to treat others the way we would want to be treated, respect and love ourselves, and cause no harm. What do we do? The exact darn opposite.

That being said….instead seek them as you would a friend…not only will it strengthen the bond you have, but it will also strengthen you. You are never less…we are all equal, and they want you to know that, as well. If you don’t love or respect yourself…how do you expect anyone else to?

 

Lots of Love and Blessed Be xxx

First off, let me say how much the POTUS  genuinely makes me want to curl up under a rock and never want to face humanity again – but at the same time makes me think..HEY Maybe I am actually qualified for jobs I’m really not!! Go for it!! All jokes aside, the cheesy peach needs to get impeached.

While scrolling through the news feed on Facebook, I was shocked at the numerous ‘Witches Gathering to Put a Spell on Trump’ thing…. Ok..I understand wanting to do good (I’m Wiccan, f.f.s… I believe in causing harm to none and helping others).. but I see soooo much damage going on! Here’s some points I’d like to bring up:

  1. With the amount of energy – it’s hella potent at the moment- swirling around us, manifesting…do we –really– want to send out negative energy into the universe by focusing on him? A binding spell is in the grey, so to speak. Binding spells can go very wrong, very fast! The karma threefold law comes in effect plenty of times with this kind of spell. Instead , we should take advantage of positive energy by putting a protection spell on the universe and its inhabitants….no negative energy possible repercussions!
  2. How does it make us witches look? For real. We spent sooooo long trying to not look so wild in society in hopes to end the witch hunts,etc. That we’re going to fall back into those times where I will have to go back into the damn broom closet for my own safety. Once again – show them we use our magick for good! Not Bad that can snap back from binding.
  3. Being Wiccan and abiding by the rede and rule of 3, it really makes me wonder my fellow Wiccan friends…they do realize that some of the spell goes against our rede/beliefs…..right?
  4. Let’s stop putting so much negative out! You can’t fight fire with fire! Let’s instead drop some cool a.f. chill water over it and watch how much power we truly can take on.

Anyways…let me know your views on the matter! Blessed Be xx

Just thought I’d do another Valentine’s/love related post before getting ready to bartend for all the mushy folks tonight!

I love ‘love’. I love genuine love. But with every ounce of there is general extract, there is also a bunch of bad apples in the bunch. Toxic love. Lust. Anything but actual love.

Tell-tale signs of toxic, not real love:

• Need to control your partner. You won’t let them talk to anyone, like anything, shut off all communications because you’re damn insecure. Real love trusts. Real love does not take away the person from all they once knew. You got an issue? Handle it like an adult. Also, your partner is a damn adult (unless you’re a teen, still..) and they have the right to make their own decisions. Stop being an assclown.

• Basing their worth because of monetary stature. Love isn’t weighed in the almighty dollar. The time spent, the vibes you give, those silent words unspoken…..those things are worth more than millions. Only focusing on what they physically give you and all things to do with the dollar bill….you’re losing grip on what is love. Cuz that sure as hell ain’t it.

• Plus other things such as narcissism, loaded with negativity and you feel as if they are draining your energy, just wanting to ‘get back’ at someone with your actions all the time….

That ain’t love. Learn what love is .

Love and respect makes the world go around.

Love each other, and let your love glow shine!!

xxx

Happy Valentine’s Day, Love Birds!

Since I made a little post on some eccentric pick up lines that will definitely be unique and make your little horror honey squirm with delight in my section, ‘Mortician’s Coroner’, I thought I would address a topic that’s gonna go deep into my mind thoughts- and it was getting a bit quiet in the ‘Inside My Mind’ section, anyways!

The tattoo curse.

The myth.

The legend.

BUSTED!!!

My lovey and I were being all cute and I , of course, decided to be my weird little self and flirt with him (2 years together, and we still flirt! Never give it up!) by saying we should get butt tattoos sometime. Then after a little chuckle we did go into serious conversation about sometime in the future getting tattooed together. All of a sudden, my romantic gears come to a screeching halt as I gasp and utter ever so softly….”B-But….what about the curse?” Totally oblivious to my outburst of silence, he asks me what is the curse.

LE GASP!! YOU DON’T KNOW ABOUT -THE- CURSE?!

That curse you were told about the first time you locked eyes on someone, or got your first piece of art on your body…The curse that if dare you chance it, it will curse you and your relationship will be doomed the moment the machine’s needle hits your body?! THAT CURSE?!

After a few breaths and brain functioning again in a logical manner, I decide to try out mythbusting this lochness monster.

Let’s look at our evidence so we can go full blown 8 Stages of FBI Analysis I learned in Sociology.

Alright, so couples get a tattoo as a sign of their love towards each other….there’s nothing in the ink that is cursed by a hoodoo artist or the artist themselves..check…tattoos are a form of commit– WAIT! CASE OPEN-SHUT!

That C word.

Commitment.

Tattoos are a form of commitment, as is love. The real love and real commitment stays. For those who are scared of commitment or this level of commitment- that’s what makes them part. It’s the sudden realization knowing they are now tied down with battleship chains to this marker and their partner, and if it’s true- they will stay….if not, they will run for the hills! (Music puns, all the way!)

That being said, have a long hard talk with your partner to see where you stand – coverups can get expensive! If you know what your love and you have is genuine, or you want a friendship tattoo,etc. Think about the long run…Just make sure you’re both on the same page and not in a drunken stupor going in to a walk in parlour! (Ps- Not a good idea to be intoxicated while being inked, see a latter post of mine on the do’s and don’t’s of tattooing).

Be awesome , love with 110% of you! If you have any cute Valentine’s Day pics, stories, or tattoos- please share!! All the best,

xxx

This isn’t fluffy bunny stuff or humour for today’s episode of Mortician’s Coroner , so I highly recommend if you are awkward around talking death- this may not the post for you. If you do find the afterlife interesting- please do stay and feel free to comment and join in on the discussion. We will be covering what happens when a loved one passes and our thoughts with what goes on about funerary services and what is the ‘right thing’. Viewer Discretion is advised.

Looking at other mortician blogs and outlooks I thought of a bunch of questions that I would like to cover with my views. So it’s kind of like my ‘Inside My Mind’ meets ‘Mortician’s Coroner’ on here. Listed are said questions / topics of debate:

  1. Hearses- why do people have so much fear and hatred towards them (I’m pro- hearse- they’re amazing.)
  2. Respect the dead – are you doing what’s right for them or what YOU want?
  3. The new age of Mortuary – Bodies of the future
  4. What it takes- the mentality behind the industry

Short and sweet. Short and sweet. Let’s start with the first topic of debate : Hearses.

I hate seeing people glare at these gorgeously designed vehicles that serve multi purposes. Originally used as ambulances back in olden times, they were used for transportation of bodies- without them you would be taking the dead way, not the hospital way. No, they are not an omen of death, either. Personally, I would love one of these cars! You can go camping, picnic, travel, sell shit outta your car, etc! Might I add, they are beautiful! This topic of debate arose when this hella awesome guy here in NS – proud to say is now a friend of mine, now- encountered some ignoramuses getting their tail feathers ruffled just over his hearse. This hearse is actually one of the most gorgeous ones I have seen around here (thought I’d never see a badass hearse other than the ones I’ve seen on Pimp My Ride, etc) but the immaculate detailing is truly mind blowing and doesn’t look like your everyday hearse. Truly a piece of art. Anyways, these people wanted him to remove the hearse from his driveway because it was making people ‘uneasy’. Umm….really? Why is there a stigma attached? END THE STIGMA!! It’s like people getting uneasy of a police car even though there may be no one in it. It’s just a car that serves a purpose! Hell, for all you know, there could be bodies in a van…but no one’s losing their shit at that. Anyways, in my opinion, hearses are amazing for multi functions inside and out of its mortuary services. Agree or disagree?

Topic #2…. This one gets to me a bit…a lot, actually. I understand the grieving process and this will tie in with the next two subjects as well, a bit, but people for real need to learn to breathe and do the right thing. People get caught up a lot in their own wants and needs after a person dies – proven fact that in grieving, people do not think properly- and act on impulse and make very quick decisions without thinking of the repercussions. Say for instance, Nanna Jo wanted a short and sweet little reception at her house and to be cremated and have her ashes scattered over her cat’s grave- Respect her and carry her wish. Do not go and have a huge, expensive church service where you invite the queen of England and get an expensive coffin where you have U2 perform at her service. Respect. The. Deceased. Being a medium, I communicate with spirits a lot, as well. The last thing you wanna do is have a spirit not at peace- you may not feel them or deal with their angst, but I do. So, do both the deceased and us mediums a favour and just respect their wishes. Also, funerary costs can get quite hefty, as well. Here’s the brutally honest truth even some other mortuary blogs and posts will say about the hidden truth- your grief is used against you. Make a living off of the dead. The most expensive caskets are at the front and will be pushed at you, and since you’re a vulnerable little gaffer at this hard time, it will be used against you, sadly. Please, do not shell out your dough and end up in debt because of some grandiose plan you have- just respect what your deceased one wants without breaking the bank and ending up in bankruptcy. In the end, it all comes down to respect.

Topic #3….New age of mortuary!! People have been talking about this a lot actually around me and I’ve found quite an interest in it as well as have some different ideas. There are sooo many new ways of being recycled, so to speak. You can become a tree…be pressed into a record or some object…etc instead of just having your ashes or body sit there. You can also donate your body parts to help with new studies to help find new cures in medicine simply by donating your cadaver. I think it’s a great idea being able to personally do things with bodies now. Like you can donate your parts and help those in the medicinal field, and you can even make a little necklace to be remembered by or help grow a tree that will last so technically you can live wayyyy longer! Or if you’re a musician like myself, you can have your song or your fav song be turned into a record your loved ones can cherish forever…simply because you gave the gift of music. I find it’s a better way to use ourselves once our spirit body has left to the afterlife and our physical is just chillin’ about. Eh?

Topic #4…What it takes…This one actually got to me and I found it kinda interesting. I love reading up on what happens to us and learning once we pass. But this has got me stuck. Being a medium – physical medium- myself, I find it hard dealing with the energies sometimes at funerals. Yet, I love to console people and help pass on messages to their loved ones to help them. How to make this scale balanced is the question. I feel. I feel too much sometimes being a sensitive and empath. In the industry thought you must be able to balance sympathy with using grieving people – that’s the only part I would fail at. I couldn’t use people …it’s against who I am. It’s the only thing keeping me back working in a job like this. I would be there wanting to console people and help them during this time, but frig I would do an awful job at trying to take every nickel and dime out of their pockets. Yes, being a bartender we learn customer service skills and learn to disassociate ourselves sometimes from our feelings to upsell items…..but….the is a kicker when it comes to dealing with a topic so personal to someone- a death of a loved one. That is the main struggle besides being on call 24/7 and missing out on many events in life. It can be very hard and if you’re not able to disassociate yourself from your beliefs, it can be quite the kicker.

Once again, I’d love to hear everyone’s input on these topics. Thanks for taking the time to tune in.

Love your Mistress of Maritime Macabre xxx

We got some humour too…You just gotta open your eyes and don’t break your stitchings.  Here’s some little humour from yours truly.

  1. Wanna really flatter your loved one and compliment them without the typical , “You’re so stunning!”..Try ‘You’re Open Casket good’…Because you know. Makeup game on point and the wardrobe and all the hard work to look good. Yes huh.
  2. “My love for you burns hotter than any crematorium ever could.” Hot, sizzle. Hopefully not a boom cuz that could cost a lot and have severe damage. Check for metal on the body first.
  3. “You only want me for my body”…..Nope. Well maybe…not yet. Not into -that- sorta thing. But I love you for your mind, too.
  4. “Tag! You’re it”….Oh. This game has just crossed the line.
  5. Get some ‘His and Hearse” Accessories or tattoos…. get it? No? Ok.
  6. On holidays/celebrations like this, celebrate like a mortician and grab a cold one!! Booze. Not bodies. Gosh.
  7. “I’ve got the perfect body…wanna see?” Mine, of course…ha..ha…ha…
  8. What would you like to drink….a Mor-tini? hehe. Side carte of formaline…no?
  9. “We can play doctors and you can examine my body parts…” But drop the “I’m a coroner in training” ….Keep them guessing…they don’t need to know.
  10. “You’re precious like buried treasure”…..Treasure, not bodies. *Facepalm*
  11. “Did you just come fresh outta the crematorium? Cuz your body is smokinnnnn!” Straight up.
  12. “Here’s some flowers to match your dapper looking snazzed up self….You’re a dead knockout!” ….Oooooo what are you implying…
  13. “You’re my place I feel at rest…..I’d be empty and dead without you”……sooo, I’m your coffin?

Stay awesome and creepy! Love your Mistress of Maritime Macabre xx

I am a dark little ball of sunshine and decided to start a new little sub-topic section in this lovely blog of mine: Morticians Coroner. -Get it..instead of Corner?

This fall, the Mistress of Maritime Macabre will be visiting some spooky locations, sharing some creepy goodies, and sharing the haunts of the Maritimes! Sound fun? From both real haunting goodness, to little quirks and attractions- you will not want to miss out on this adventure! Til then…I will be sharing some Mortician humour as well as other little goodies. So keep your eyes peeled..don’t sew them shut…..

You know that feeling of feeling fresh and like a runway model once you leave the salon that you have the insatiable urge each time to go out and show off the new ‘do after?

That feeling.

That amazing feeling of having hair that has been given the extra little TLC it deserves. I look forward to every 6-7 weeks I get mine done. That feeling of confidence knowing how amazing I feel on the outside matches the sensation radiating from the inside. What makes me glow even more now, though? Proper hair care. Taking the time to get the products for keeping the thing that gives me the most confidence.

Every day we are bombarded with people like Selena Gomez preaching about how Pantene makes her hair oh so lustrous. When I first used Pantene, my hair felt shiny too….the bad kind. You know…greasy and oily..lost every ounce of volume I had…more split ends…had to wash 24/7..even my skin was oily as well! But hey, TV has GOT to be right….right? -WRONG!!! I lost my confidence as well as some of my hair from the damage it was going through. Why…why was this going on? The ranting and raving on TV…Hell, being super immaculate when it comes to washing and products is my thing, so I thought there was no way in hell that any residue would be left on my scalp, and that it must be normal for such a product to do this to my hair….once again..WRONG.

That was until I started seeing someone who studied hair..had an immaculate education with hair and products that were legitimately good for your hair.

When I first went to a salon, I was scared…embarrassed…I thought I looked awful and that I had problems wrong with me. Once I got in, and she examined both the levels of my hair and scalp and the conditions they were in…she surprised me. There was STILL residue , a waxy substance left from that damn Pantene!! I wish I could have gotten a picture of the horrid stuff that people are unaware is nestling like a bug all snug in a rug on your scalp. It was truly freaky! She recommended different treatments for home use as well as in the salon , receiving various ones over the course of two and a half years now.

Fast forward to today. This time two years ago, I was a complete mess as mentioned up above. But now…..now my hair has doubled its thickness, is lustrous, volumized, down to my mid back/lower lumbar , no split ends, etc! Keep in mind, I am like a chameleon, always dying my hair! I am free of dryness and the wax that plagued me for years.

Products! The products I use are made by Redken. It’s a helluva good investment from what I’ve seen in others, as well! You pay a bit less than the brands out now claiming to be the ultimate hair redeemer- AND Redken lasts longer. You’re paying a helluva low price for what you get in the long run. Products last longer, no bad repercussions like oily hair (I’ve seen by others claiming out there it’s shine…nope , gross!) ,etc. My stylist said the best way to describe these products- they are prescribed. Not over the counter. Not something you can sell like a Zydrate dealer (Hands up, Repo! fans!) . These products are recommended through people educated within the industry that tailor the products to fit you.

Some products I have used as well as others around me have used for restoring your beautiful locks (and I recommend from personal experience) are as follows:

Redken CAT Treatment: My very first treatment from two years ago!! And guess what….I STILL GOT PRODUCT LEFT. HA! How about THAT for long lasting product?! Oh, did I mention it’s less expensive but also better quality than the other stuff going around? If you love investing in good product that won’t leave your wallets crying and that trip to Italy in forever waiting, get on this gravy train! Wanna know the perks of this another must have? Check this out! Straight from Redken –

This strengthening hair treatment spray boosts hair’s shine and softness. It brings protein to hair’s core, restoring internal strength and shine.

  • Reconstructs, reconditions and adds immediate strength without added weight
  • Helps prep hair before chemical services to prevent future damage
  • Helps prevent breakage and split ends

And boy, can I testify to this! When first using, your professional stylist will tell you how much to incorporate in your washing routine at first. For me it was three times the first week. Now I’m down to once or twice a month now my hair is back in black!…erm, purple! This helps restore the protein within your hair..if you’re willing to ingest your protein, give a little love to your locks!

 

Redken Diamond Oil: For me, I used the product out of the Diamond Oil collection called, “Glow Dry”. Used for when you’re blow drying your hair and styling it for the lustrous diamond appearance as well as protection from the heat damage that normally occurs when applying heat to your hair. Also available in this line are shampoos and two other levels of oil you can purchase, as well. Highly recommended to consult one of the lovely professionals in the salon first before purchasing. Each one is tailored to different hair levels. You don’t want a super level if your hair does not require a mega load. Consult your hair doctor!

 

OLAPLEX Treatment: Not Redken, and is a sister to that of the CAT treatment. Olaplex is one of the top dogs besides CAT that saved my hair. Also, It’s a treatment I get at the salon that keeps me safe and sound when colouring. Here’s a little ditty on this angel- You bleach your hair, cross process your hair a lot….you dye it like there’s no tomorrow like me? Olaplex restores your hair and doesn’t get it all brittle and downright hay-like. Your hair is lustrous and volumized. Olaplex helps bond your hair , that being done makes sure you don’t get dry dead ends, and flyaways. It helps reconnect the broken disulphide sulphur bonds in the hair that limits the damage and saves it when you’re colouring your locks.

Redkin Cerafill: There are two kinds- Retaliate and Defy. My love has been using Defy in the past 5 months, and HOLY DIFFERENCE! Even after the first initial use when our stylist introduced him to the product and used it on his hair…all I can say is, from the first step you could see the difference. Now his hair has thickened, developed more, puts mine at severe competition for silkiness and strength …great now I have the urge to touch it.

What is Cerafill? Here’s a little description taken from the authentic Redken page for it’s product, Defy, itself: “Defy flat, thin-looking hair with NEW Cerafill Defy. Powerful formulas with zinc PCA, a known DHT inhibitor, ceramide and SP-94 strengthen hair, nourish the scalp, and improve the appearance of thin hair. Hair looks and feels fuller with healthy shine.”

I can personally testify its justifications. It works the most quickest I’ve seen in the hair care market, blowing away the competition!

 

Redken One United: Might as well call it the one stop shop that is essential when washing those locks! It has 25 benefits that I take full advantage of each wash. Just a little spirt, and voila! Wanna know the benefits, even though you may be an outsider to the Redken hair proection for sexy smart beasts club? Come take my hand, you can come in with me to my meeting so you too can hear the benefits/ Can I get an Amen?!

MANAGEABILITY

    1. Conditions
    2. Nourishes
    3. Improves manageability
    4. Helps even out porous hair
    5. Reduces dryness
    6. Detangles
    7. Instant results
    8. Ideal cutting lotion       

PROTECTION

    1. Primes hair for styling
    2. Helps prevent breakage from brushing
    3. Safe for color-treated hair
    4. Safe for ombre hair
    5. Helps prevent heat damage
    6. Helps prevent split ends
    7. Helps seal in hair cuticle
    8. Helps shield against external aggressors

BEAUTY

    1. Gives a silky touch
    2. Adds smoothness
    3. Adds shine
    4. Helps control frizz
    5. Anti-static
    6. Controls fly-aways
    7. Makes blow-dry easier
    8. Style refresher
    9. Lightweight results

Still got other thoughts after all those benefits provided to you by Redken? How about having your hair s-s-s-SAVED?! (More Repo! references..sorry). It’s quick…it’s clean…and you’ll be feeling like  a pure goddess with this little step to your routine!

 

 

That being said, I hope everyone got some cool little facts on products that I have used as well as those near and dear to me, that are proven results. Always seek a professional when it comes to products concerning your health. 1) Would you rely on google for all your medical needs? Would you ask a butcher to do your surgery? (Although that’d be interesting to see, it’s not good when it comes to various surgeries.) 2) Would you spend 20$ on a tattoo from an unreliable source just because hurtygurdy said to? Trust the professionals! You get the bang for your buck and beyond when consulting a professional.

Many thanks to Bonnie from The Head Shoppe for the education, time, and love when it comes to my hair!

Peace and love yourself!

x

Even math says ‘x=y’ …like WHY the hell is that damn EX keep coming up into situations?!

They are not part of the formulae to your present day. Nope.

So here lies the question… WHY do they keep showing up? They’re like when you’re happy..you got an event the next day, you got your nails done, got your clothes all fresh, but when you wake up the next morning… BAM! A big nasty zit is like, ‘HOLA! I CAME TO CRASH YOUR PARTY!’. And that my friends, is what having your ex involved still in your life is like. To that I say: Here lies the past…Rest in peace. *Throw salt* I BANISH THEE, DEMONIC PRESENCE!

Luckily, My past isn’t involved anymore in my present going-on’s. We ended on mutual terms for them both and they respect the idea of moving on with respect. To them: Thank you. Not saying that I hate them at all, no, we have respect. But…we just don’t go about intruding and getting all friendly-friendly in the other person’s lives.

That being said, I don’t get why exes are all up in some people’s lives still with the hugs and cute pet names FULLY KNOWING that it would make themselves uncomfortable if they were put in that same situation. The person no longer is with you. Just give it the fuck up. Got a cute name for the person you were with , but you fucked it up and they are now happy with a way better person? PUT THAT SHIT TO REST. You look pathetic. Clearly, they are not interested in you because you blew the chances being an assclown, so just move on and find a new soul to torment.

Sorry. I got a bit nuts there with the ranting. I just really despise exes trying to get all cutesy and manipulative while their previous partner is happy in a new relationship. The universe attracts what you put out…and honey, you’re putting your energy to waste.

Common topic with this subject…did you notice how it’s mostly the male partner’s exes that are the shit disturbers? I mean, being a female, I don’t actually have ANY run-ins with mine. If crazy shit aligns and we see each other, we will be like ‘hi, bye, kiss my ass, etc.’ then leave. Whereas if an ex female from your male companion comes up to him it’s all like, ‘HUGS! *INSERT PARTNER’S NAME HERE IN ALL CAPS SIGNIFYING THEIR PATHETIC SCREECHING* , OMG! My snookie-wookums! How are you? OMGGGGG remember wheeeeeennnnn _____?! *Eyelash flutters* xoxoxo ‘.

Cut that shit. Ew. Just ew.

To me, that’s totally disrespectful as hell to still be like that. Just be normal. Say hi. Stop with the eye sex and cutesie shit reserved for that person’s partner. How would you like it if someone did that to your guy? Make you shudder and get pissed? Good. That’s how you’re making that poor dame feel. Get some respect for you and others. Just move on. Keep swimming…..into the mouth of a kraken.

I understand though that sometimes male exes can be like that when I was talking to others. Happens a lot less, but still crazy not cool to do. Just don’t do it, anyone.

That being said here is my list of 10 kinda guidelines & summing up in regards to this issue:

  1. You can still be friends. Just realize you don’t have the same title and got to respect the new person. If you can be respectful to them, they will respect you in return. You’ll get so much respect for doing that and you won’t look trashy.
  2. Move on. You’ll only make yourself upset if all you focus on is trying to manipulate your way to try to get them back. Chances are if they are super happy, they won’t even give you the time of a wet dream. That being said, don’t waste your energy putting that into the universe and instead find your sexy stud muffin or sexy kitten and you’ll feel soooo much better.
  3. Stop. Screeching. The. Person’s. Name. This ties in with #1. You look pathetic and you do not have that ‘role’ anymore. Also, respect.
  4. Messaging. With Facebook and cellular phones being at our call all the time, yes that brings the temptation to drunk or sober message your ex-sweetheart. DON’T DO IT. No, they do not want to see a pic of you being cute or sending a cute message. Nor does their partner. You know that “R” word mentioned sooo much here? Respect? Yeah. Get some.
  5. Gestures. Body talk is the second half of the talky-talk. The eye sex, boob squash, bite lip, hair flip bullshit….STOP IT, HO. Giggle…..
  6. How your family ties in (if you’re the ex causing the BS). Just like with yourself, have your family also respect your ex-hunny and his new hunny. Stop trying to get them to hornswaggle him/her back and bring up those memories that makes the new lover feel like they’re going to cry from the breaking of their heart.
  7. Leave the past in the past. It’s got no spot for the future. No one wants that heavy baggage full of trash that is preventing them from becoming a hollywood star. Let it go and shine. Yes, even you EX. Shine like a diamond and attract someone who is meant to be your second half because CLEARLY..the past didn’t work out. Learn. Live and learn from that.
  8. A shade of bitch looks awful on anyone. Resting bitch face, being a bitch…those were just fads. Not something to be proud of. Be the better person and rise above. Being able to let shit go and make a good path for yourself is a look of pure, utter brilliance on everyone!
  9. Don’t be a bitter bitch (continued). Your soul mate is wandering somewhere while you’re trying to change what isn’t meant. This is the universe telling you your soulmate is out there and NOT the past person.
  10. Last but not least, let me re-iterate this most important point : RESPECT!!!! Have respect all around and things will work out fine and dandy in the end. Without respect, how the hell do you ever think someone will respect you? We all deserve respect. But as in anything, it must be earned and not just handed to your ass on a golden platter. Earn it. When you earn that respect, it feels like you’ve won the lottery of life.

 

All things considered, this is a really touchy topic that we all have gone through in our lives let it be with our partner’s exes, our own…or maybe you’re one of these evil nasty exes? In the comments below, please do not hesitate to tell me your thoughts on this subject, your stories and comments are always appreciated!

 

Rock on and don’t be an ass xx